Welcome to Curbed Comparisons, a regular column exploring what you can rent for a set dollar amount in different neighborhoods. Is one person’s studio another person’s townhouse? Today’s price: $5,600.
Not too long ago the hottest words in SF real estate were “Victorian house in Bernal Heights.” The neighborhood isn’t as prominent these days, but, in part, that’s due to hitting a saturation point, perhaps thanks to homes like this Cortland Vic with the violet trim and the tightly cylindrical staircase in the main entry. The deal is $5,600 per month for a three-bed, two-bath place with garage and “new composite deck.” Note that the full house is still a single unit, unlike many older Vics in other neighborhoods chopped into duplexes or more. And the ad touts this place as “newly renovated.” The one charm not advertised is whether or not the landlord allows pets.
This 24h Street condo is very close to putting on airs, declared “the Nightingale of Noe Valley” and “Paradise by the Park” by its ambitious ad hoping to lull renters into a three-bed, two-bath pad for $5,600 per month. The park in question is Dolores Park, although this home is actually about three or four blocks south, “nestled in between the suburban charm of the Castro and the quirkiness of the Mission.” The 1,500 square feet comes with “updated finish with both hardwood and carpet, “vaulted ceilings and classical styling cues,” balcony, and fireplace. The backyard is split with the other unit in the building. And as with the previous home, there’s no mention of pets.
It’s not uncommon for rental ads to misunderstand what neighborhood they’re in—this live/work loft on Bluxome Street is listed under Potrero Hill, but is actually much closer to South Beach and Mission Creek. Which is an odd oversight given how much prestige is attached to those neighborhoods these days; maybe a coup in spirit for Potrero. In any case, this one-bed, two-bath setup stretches across (and up into) an enormous 1,750 feet with “exposed concrete pillars, piping accents, and track lighting,” plus “[custom] floor to ceiling windows and blinds,” and “beautiful cabinetry.” Less beautiful: No pets allowed. The deal is $5,500 per month.
If this Nob Hill condo and its curious marquee title of “prestigious Nob Hill stunning old charm” seem familiar, it’s because this place appeared on Comparisons a few weeks ago. In fact, it was the most popular unit featured that day. Whereas then it was one of the most expensive units on the slate, this time it’s not at the bottom of the economic spectrum (granted the difference is only $100, but it all counts), so let’s see how it stacks up against pricier homes. The ad touts its “lavish lobby with amazing period charm,” “limestone accents,” and “living/dining room with cozy, decorative fireplace, impressive beam ceiling.” It’s still $5,500 per month for two beds and two baths on Powell Street. Best of all, both cats and small dogs are allowed.
And finally, we’ve saved the biggest for last—this house in the Outer Richmond just south of the golf course, offering a whopping 2,300 square feet in which renters will find three bedrooms, one and a half baths, “large living room, separate dining room, outdoor atrium in the middle,” “huge garage” (1,000 square feet, considerably larger than a great many San Francisco apartments), and some of those oft-mentioned “original details.” Also: “Responsible pet owners and their well-behaved pets are welcome.” It’ll cost you $5,600 per month.
Which rental would you choose?
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Bernal Heights house
Noe Valley condo
South Beach loft
Nob Hill condo