Welcome to Curbed Comparisons, a regular column exploring what you can rent for a set dollar amount in different neighborhoods. Is one person’s studio another person’s townhouse? Today’s price: $10,000.
On the one hand, it’s arguably obscene that anyone pays $10,000 per month for housing. But on the other hand, not many housing markets can sport such listings and honestly expect anyone to pay, so there is unique potential for rubbernecking in SF. This “housing-spacious luxury historic loft” in the East Cut is actually $9,999 (surely that extra buck will make all of the difference). The Harbor Lofts were once the Hathaway Warehouse, built in 1857, which is now “one of the six oldest buildings in the city,” although those sorts of accolades are always a little hazy after the loss of almost all official housing records following the 1906 quake. Anyway, this condo fits two beds, two baths, and a whole lot of brickwork into 2,000 square feet, along with additions like marble bathroom floors and a temperature-controlled wine cellar. You’d think pets would be a no-brainer for this kind of money, but this one is offered as corporate housing, so it’s no surprise there’s no mention of pets.
Rather than remodeled or renovated, the ad for this full Victorian house in NoPa floats a much less common R-word: “restored,” promising a return to the home’s original 19th century charm. This one packs a payload of three stories, over 3,000 square feet, six bathrooms, three and a half baths, three working fireplaces, striped hardwood floors, formal living room and dining room, a powder room on top of the regular bathrooms, and a deck. Phew. Notice the rich woodwork on those bannisters too. But even when you’re paying $9,995 per month they still don’t want pets on the premises. The nerve.
Bernal Heights has a competing three-level Victorian house of its own, complete with an eye-catching teal exterior laced with gentle brown shingles (both regular and fish scale) that provide a pleasing accent to the bold color choices. This is one of the many homes that the city has no specific record of when it was originally built, but the ad attests that it dates to 1886. It’s also been recently renovated with the likes of a revamped kitchen (notice the tremendous marble finish on the center island), dining room, and radiant heating throughout the house. It comes with three beds, three baths, and 3,000 square feet top to bottom. There are no fireplaces, but the remains of the old brick chimney have survived and peak through the walls in the upstairs bathroom. The price is $10,000 a month even (insert whistle here), and renters can bring pets.
Truth be known, this Russian Hill condo does not look significantly different than a great deal of the other modern housing stock in the city, offering a contemporary look through and through but not a whole lot extra by way of sugar on top. But maybe that’s the point—contemporary designs are popular because buyers and renters like them, and presumably that goes for the mega-rich too. It is a whole lot bigger than most places with 2,290 feet and packing in three beds and three and a half baths plus a roof deck and den with wet bar. It’s $9,950 per month, but—good grief—does not allow pets, either.
Last up, a “unique one-of-a-kind furnished penthouse” near Union Square on O’Farrell Street, featuring three beds and two baths at just over 2,500 square feet. The city dates the 29-unit Odeon building to 2006, a product of MBH Architects. This particular unit offers “a two-level great room” along with grand, upper-level master suite,” “oversized bathroom,” and “an extraordinary walk-in closet/dressing room.” The price: $10,000 per month, and no word about pets.
Which rental would you choose?
This poll is closed
East Cut Loft
Bernal Heights Victorian
Russian Hill Condo
Union Square Penthouse