What $9,000 rents you in San Francisco right now

Welcome to Curbed Comparisons, a regular column exploring what you can rent for a set dollar amount in different neighborhoods. Is one person’s studio is another person’s townhouse? Today’s price: $6,900.

↑ Yep, $9,000/month to live anywhere is pretty crazy, but then, it’s a crazy world we live in. Which is why it’s apropos that we start with this Castro condo dubbed “UNREAL” by the parties presently hoping to attract a $9,000/month renter to the three bed, three and a half bath 17th Street pad. What do you get for that kind of money, beyond just 2,100 square feet? “En suite baths in all three bedrooms, hardwood floors, private roof deck, [...] aluminum windows and doors, and custom cabinetry,” plus attached garage, although the deal applies to only one parking space there. The offer also allows for pets on sight, both dogs and cats; because for this kind of scratch it had certainly better.

↑ It’s tough to judge what the allure of Millennium Tower may be these days. The completion of Salesforce Tower and Salesforce Park right next door have presumably enhanced the value of the units, but at the same time its continued structural woes must surely keep folks feeling off-kilter about it. Of course, in the long run that’s something for owners and not renters to worry about, so anyone who takes this $9,000/month condo deal on the 33rd floor perhaps already has all those bases covered. It’s two beds, two baths, and 1,700 square feet, offering the usual Millennium package of encompassing windows and sedately contemporary condo aesthetics. Happily, that includes pets here too.

↑ Other than a condo in one of the city’s most infamous buildings, presumably nothing says you’re an incredibly wealthy SF renter quite so loudly as a mansion in Pacific Heights for $9,000/month. The term “mansion” is relative of course, but at 3,500 square feet nobody is ever going to call this California Street addition small. It’s three beds and three baths, and if potential renters are worrying about how they’re possibly going to create appropriately ritzy decor then not to worry, because the ad is quite insistent that the offer is for a furnished home. “Feel free to bring your Prada and your poodle,” the landlord says in closing.

↑ And of course Pac Heights is SF’s storied past, but Potrero Hill and particularly the eastern flank nearest to Mission Bay is the future, and in this case someone’s future includes an $8,800 monthly bill for three beds, three baths, and 1,400 square feet on Mississippi Street. Dubbed a “light filled, two-level penthouse” circa 2000 that “has been wonderfully maintained and magically renovated since that time.” Presumably no actual magic went into that process, although that would be a handy way to save on San Francisco’s strangling construction costs these days. The decor includes polished concrete floors and recessed lighting, but there’s no telling whether you're allowed to spruce up the place with pets.