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SantaCon SF: Where it will be, and where you should go instead

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Annual Christmastime pub crawl will descend upon this weekend

SantaCon hits Union Square.
Photo by MintImages/Shutterstock

Saturday. This Saturday. Starting at dawn and ending only God knows when. They will come. Dressed in Santa garb. Livers soaked to the brim. With nary a care for anyone or anything save for the next bar, the next bottle of craft beer, the next act of boorishness. SantaCon SF is coming. Are you prepared?

While New York City is lucky enough to quarantine the Christmastime drinking spree into two neighborhoods, San Francisco isn’t as fortunate. Like a plague, it spreads across almost the entire city. And no amount of Walking Dead evasion tactics will make you feel safe in SantaCon hotspots.

But there are a few ways to bypass the red-and-white scourge.

Places to avoid:

  • Union Square
  • The Mission
  • Divisadero
  • Hayes Valley
  • Polk Street
  • Chestnut Street
  • Union Street
  • North Beach
  • Chinatown
  • Folsom Street in SoMa
  • Market Street
  • BART
  • Muni
SantaCon santas in Union Square. Hundreds of them! Photo by Joanne Wan

Safe spaces:

  • The top of the Filbert Street Steps
  • Treasure Island
  • San Francisco libraries
  • 16th Avenue Tiled Steps
  • Sutro Bath caves
  • Diamond Heights
  • Glen Park Canyon
  • Outer Sunset
  • Outer Richmond
  • The Castro
  • Curled up on the floor at home, praying for daybreak

An estimated 8,000 Santas are poised to descend upon the city this Saturday, December 9. Lyft has partnered up with SantaCon, with plans to hand out special fidget spinners and bottle openers.

Also, there’s a competing anti-SantaCon wine crawl for those who dare do boozy battle with the Red and White Walkers.

Godspeed, denizens.