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Karl the Fog Tells Us About Judah Heights

The People's Guide is Curbed SF's tour o' the nabes, lead by our most loyal readers, favorite bloggers, and other luminaries of our choosing. Have a piece to say? We'll be happy to hand over the megaphone. This week, we welcome Karl the Fog.

[Karl via Esther Reyes]

Tell us something we don't know about your neighborhood: Since I'm constantly on the move, I'll consider the sky as my neighborhood. Or as we call it up here, "Judah Heights." Property sells better when you add "Heights" to the end of it. Rich people love elevation.

Something you don't know about Judah Heights is that once a month we have our own version of Critical Mass called Critical Sass. It's basically a runway competition for all us clouds. Think "Zoolander" meets "Miss Congeniality." For the talent portion, I eat a city of 800,000 people in less than a minute. I always win.

Local customs of note: Going sledding down Twin Peaks into Noe Valley and the Castro, P90x over Ocean Beach, scone runs on St. Patrick's Day (John Campbell's Irish Bakery), mansion strolls in Pac Heights, and playing "Just the Tip" with the Transamerica Pyramid.

Hidden gems in Judah Heights: Sunshine.

Are your neighbors "Rotten Neighbor" worthy? If so, dish. If not? well, why not? I'm not one to gossip, but I see a lot of people visiting my neighbor late at night. His name is Buena Vista Park.

Inflate the bubble or burst it: What's not-so-swell about your "perfect" neighborhood? It's hard for people to visit me up here. I see folks waving from planes as they head to Seattle, Hawaii or London, but it's rare that anyone makes Judah Heights their destination. So I just make my way down into San Francisco instead. I'm a giving fog.

The final word on Judah Heights: The rent is cheap. The views are spectacular. No loud neighbors who throw parties on Tuesday nights. The temperature remains the same all year long. And I never have to wait in line for my favorite Ike's Sandwich (Menage A Trois). It's pretty much the best place ever.
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