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Volkswagen Reveals Plans to Make Fat Americans Even Fatter

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OMG you guys the future is going to be fantastic. We're all going to live in our cars, robotic vehicles will drive us directly to food troughs, and also they will have lasers. Lasers! Cars are the solution to all of our problems, and that's according to a car salesman.

On Monday, we mentioned that Volkswagen executive Toscan Bennett (along with some other wealthy industrialists) were holding a fun little forum to make ridiculous predictions about the future. Sadly, though, their predictions turned out not to be terribly original: they more or less just ripped off the cruise ship from Wall-E. The plan more or less boils down stuffing more and more people into cars that do everything for us except regulate our bodily functions on roads that calculate our every move and transforming the surface of the Earth to a horrible dystopian matrix of idiots sailing around on leering freeways.

Frankly, if there's a down side, we're just not seeing it.

· Experts to Calm our Fears of Robot Takeover [Curbed SF]
· Volkswagen Executives Forecast Clean, Accident Free and Fun Driving in Next 20 Years, Advance Idea of Car as Personal Living Space [Press Release]